Sunday, December 19, 2010

Small Realization

This may seem insignificant to you, but it was a big thing for me.

The other night, after the girls were in bed, Kent and I settled down to watch the new Shrek movie. I expressed that I didn't love the first Shrek, because it was supposed to be a kids movie but had a lot of inappropriate adult humor.

Then I found myself holding my breath and bracing myself for something.

Kent acknowledged what I said and went to watching the movie.

I realized that I had been preparing for criticism. I had been expecting something along the lines of being called a prude and being told I was stupid. This is the reaction I would have been expecting 4 years ago, when I was still married to my ex-husband.

Through the movie, I thought about this. I could not think of a single time that Kent has criticized me. Don't get me wrong, we have had our disagreements, but that is different than cutting someone down. He has never made me feel bad about myself.

I do not often find myself reacting like I did that day, expecting repercussion. But I guess bits of old habits come out every now and then. With Kent, I can express any feeling, thought, or desire openly with him. While he may not always agree, he accepts and loves me just the way I am and is good at showing it.

The difference is monumental. It has made such a world of difference with how I feel inside.

7 comments:

Kate said...

Kathleen, I loved reading this. Thats my favorite part about being married, having someone who listens to you even if its seems a little silly. I am so glad that Kent treats you right. Yay for awesome Husbands.

Katrina Wilson said...

Hey Kathleen That was such a sweet blog. It just reminded me how much I miss our talks. :( I'm so glad you found someone to treat you as well as Kent. He sure is a great guy! Mark and I were looking at your pictures tonight and he says Camryn looks just like you and Corinne looks just like Kent!! Love you guys. Hope I get to see you when I'm there. Have a merry christmas

Unknown said...

Those "little" things are what makes big differences, in my opinion. I'm so grateful that Kent makes you feel safe and not only lets you express yourself openly but accepts and validates your thoughts and feelings. I have always looked up to you so much so it is weird to think of anyone not thinking your opinions and thoughts are important. I love you guys! We'll see you in a week!!!!

marsha said...

I don't think that was a SMALL realization, I think it was very big. I agree with Nicole, the "small" things in life are usually the most important.
You deserve to be so happy. I'm so glad that you are. You and Kent are very blessed to have each other.

Danielle said...

He seems like such a good man, Kathleen. You deserve someone who treats you well and loves you for who you are. He makes you happy, and you can tell. :) Thanks for making him part of our extended family. ;)

Sage Hanks said...

i agree with you...:) I was there during some of those "moments" and felt many times how you deserved SOOOO much better than that! I love you and I am so grateful that i have you in my life! You have taught me so much! I prayed for the day to come when your life would be so much better and it has come! Love ya!

Jacqueline said...

That was so sweet, it made me cry. What a good husband you got. He is so right for you. I am so happy for you both. Glad he is part of our family too.